I went out last night with a few members of my old crew, and then today I stopped by the school today to say "Hey!" to those I missed. I didn't tell them I was going to do that last part, but both encounters were satisfying. It was a tad sad, too. I miss them and their companionship. I feel like I'm by myself a lot, and I am...I'm in the classroom alone and a lot of time passes without me talking to co-workers. That will come as time goes by, before and after school - I think - I hope. Right now I am very grateful for what I had and those ties, but I'm also still just trying to find my stride.
Tuesday, November 1, 2016
Life isn’t long enough to do all you could accomplish. And what a privilege even to be alive. In spite of all the pollutions and horrors, how beautiful this world is. Supposing you only saw the stars once every year. Think what you would think. The wonder of it!
Its officially November, and 80+ degrees outside. That gets to me. And yesterday got to me, to the point of me having to fight back tears. I was thinking, "its only Monday and we're on a downhill run....." Then today was fine. Good even. A complete turn around and feeling like I could actually do this. Yesterday, wasn't feeling like I could do it. Middle school is a beast that I may just have to accept that I can't tame. They're raging egos and hormones moving around on two little stilts.
I've gone to the gym a lot the past week and worked-out some of my frustration with a whole lot of aggression and sweat. The scale hasn't proven much labor, but someone made sure to tell me that I looked good, so that should be enough. For now. I'm always on myself for things - things I could do better or differently. Its everyday and that is what exhausts me most often the time. I need to concentrate on little things, little things that c make my day worthwhile.