Thursday, January 19, 2017


Some days I feel like I nailed it. I came, I saw, I conquered. Each situation was able to be navigated through, and I think I went the right direction. 
Other days I feel like I let the ball drop. More than that actually; its like I get hit head on. First a sideswipe maybe, so I'm off course or out of line because its never just a one hit and done. I don't know if its an unravelling due to not being able to recover if thats just the nature of a "bad" day....
There's still so much of this gig I haven't quite gotten the hang of. And I don't know how much of that will change because there isn't consistency in my schedule. There have been moments I've just stood there not having any idea what to do. At Beasley, I always knew what to do; other people asked ME what to do. Here no one has seemed critical, but certainly they talk....I know its an assumption but I know it has to be true at the same time. 
One thing I'm having the most difficulty accepting but I'm going to have to for my own sanity: not everyone is going to like me. Especially not every kid. AND I can't let that fear keep me from setting boundaries or being firm. I'm having to have one of my first sit-down and talk it out with a student moments tomorrow, and I kinda just want to skip the whole thing *insert sigh*. 

Friday, January 6, 2017

Up to Date

Last year I wrote hardly any blogs. Well, I posted hardly any blogs (I think a number were left unfinished or lost...). In the previous years, I have written very few blogs. So my intent is to be more conscious, disciplined, and focused about getting these written and posted this year. And not I made sure to say something about the writting because I don't want to put a blog up just to put a blog up. I want it to say something or relay something, even if it is only for me.
Today it snowed. It started at night and ran into morning and gave me a day off school. Even though that realization didn't happen until I was ready to walk out the door, it was a gift I was ready to welcome. The day was a little hard on me. Even though I feel like I got a good deal of things done, I was struggling a bit physically. I'm not sure what's up but I've had a conviction lately about going and seeing a doctor just for preventative measures. My fear is I'll be the one who says, "I run 5+ miles a day, I eat kale and drink purified water" and then I'll be given the sentence of 6 months to live.  I hardly ever "check up" on things and I don't know what has gotten me suddenly concerned other than stories. I'm hearing stories. And I am getting older I guess. 
Of course I make a list at the beginning of every year, but I prefer not to call anything on there resolutions but simply goals. The pressure to be "on it" all the time or from now on - not biting nails, not eating sugar, not watching so much tv, cleaning up more, writing more, kinda immeasurable in my book. I need specifics, a mark to hit with numbers and checkmarks. This year needs discipline/accomplishment, but I also realize I can't be so rigid. Unflexable isn't suiting me, at least right now. 

*side note: This whole not working but still getting paid deal is fantastic.

Wednesday, January 4, 2017


In regards to a lap pool, where many are intending to complete a decent workout.

1. Thou shall not cannonball into the pool, causing a tidal wave into another lane.

2. Thou shall not enter a lane without first asking permission or announcing your arrival.

3. Thou shall not announce your arrival by splashing or smacking on the head.

4. Thou shall not perform a demonstrative stroke (i.e. the butterfly) while sharing a lane.

5. Thou shall not travel from one end to the other with gizmos and gadgets (i.e. flippers/flappers, noodles, weights....) while sharing a lane if they are encrouching beyond your designated side.

6. Thou shall not toss gismos and gadgets in any which general direction of the pool (especially someone else's lane) when finished with them. 

7. Thou shall not travel across lanes if you do not have adequate time to get out of the way of the oncoming swimmer.

8. Thou shall not wear swimsuits that are not sturdy in times of activity.

9. Thou shall not wear non-swimsuit clothing into the pool (i.e. socks).

10. Thou shall not idly socialize in the pool, prohibiting others from utilizing the lane.