I can be unexpectantly difficult, in an unexpected dose. Even though I can typically check myself, its not always easy to judge...or remember to warn people. That's the part I'm sure surprises people; I come across so calm, cool, and collected and then I can feel my blood boiling. Maybe its not blood but something rises up in me. I will react ....or blow everyone off. Or both. Its deffinitly easier to just retreat. I have the need for solitude more often than others, the need to decompress as social interaction overwhelmes me - still! That's hard for people; to know I just want them to go away and not be around. I don't want to say something I regret, but I also just need space.
I haven't always travelled well with people. I think of every trip I've been on and there has been conflict or uncomfortable moments. Sure, you're travelling in close quarters with someone 24/7, trying to eat and sleep and entertain....there is bound to be stress. It should be addressed beforehand, right? Somehow that doesn't seem to take the sting out, the squirm from uncomfortableness away once it has really taken root. I guess as much as others' aggressiveness or pluckiness hurts, my silence and aloofness can do the same. And, you know what makes me feel bad? That I'm actually okay with that....
“How wonderful it is, to be silent with someone."
— Kurt Tucholsky
— Kurt Tucholsky
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