To say that I haven't done much this break is an understatement. I have realized (again) just how unsocial I really am. Other than a couple meetings with the family and a dinner with a friend, I've really interacted with few other people in 2 weeks.
I've just succomb to long workouts, books, TV/movies, pictures, organizing, and severe introverting.
Though I've been bored here and there, there has been little motivation to socialize or go do things with other people. And I'm wondering why or if something more is going on or is wrong. I was really looking forward to a friend coming in town, one that I don't get to see that often which is why I was most likely looking forward to it, but that didn't happen. So I've been relatively happy in my cozy little apartment, doing cozy little things and feeling right at home....until I realized that I have 4 days of this party left. I never really want to go back to work after a break of any kind, but I really DON'T want to go back this time. There isn't anyone I'm looking forward to seeing, nothing I'm looking forward to doing. If I said I was happy in this new job, I'd be lying. It's not that I'm unhappy; I'm simply unsure of my place, if its my fit. I'm not even sure if its feeling whether I'm good at it or not, its feeling if I am meant to take it. So much more goes on and so much more needs to be taken into consideration and unless you're there in it, I don't think I can relay it properly.
Often, as I've spent the past 10 years teaching and working with kids, I wonder if I could do something else. And do it well. I wonder if I would be motivated more, again, to do well and feel driven and productive.
I've just succomb to long workouts, books, TV/movies, pictures, organizing, and severe introverting.
Though I've been bored here and there, there has been little motivation to socialize or go do things with other people. And I'm wondering why or if something more is going on or is wrong. I was really looking forward to a friend coming in town, one that I don't get to see that often which is why I was most likely looking forward to it, but that didn't happen. So I've been relatively happy in my cozy little apartment, doing cozy little things and feeling right at home....until I realized that I have 4 days of this party left. I never really want to go back to work after a break of any kind, but I really DON'T want to go back this time. There isn't anyone I'm looking forward to seeing, nothing I'm looking forward to doing. If I said I was happy in this new job, I'd be lying. It's not that I'm unhappy; I'm simply unsure of my place, if its my fit. I'm not even sure if its feeling whether I'm good at it or not, its feeling if I am meant to take it. So much more goes on and so much more needs to be taken into consideration and unless you're there in it, I don't think I can relay it properly.
Often, as I've spent the past 10 years teaching and working with kids, I wonder if I could do something else. And do it well. I wonder if I would be motivated more, again, to do well and feel driven and productive.
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